You’re Not Going To Believe This

PolicewomanI needed to read this twice to make sure I was not seeing things.

Far from arresting men (because it’s most often men) who pester women for sex in parks or engage in “immoral acts” in public, the Police have now “officially designated areas of common land, woodland and parks as a ‘Public Sex Environment’, or PSE.”

Were you planning to take your toddlers to see the bluebells, or have a leisurely walk with the dog? Well you might want to think twice before you stumble across a gay threesome or a couple having sex in a car watched by an audience of regular “doggers”, not just ignored by the authorities but officially sanctioned by them!

Oh, and lest you think it’s just a case of the police turning a blind eye because they don’t have time to prosecute every sex pest or pervert exposing himself in public, read down to the place where it says they “provide tea and coffee” for the users of this designated sex area.

Do you believe this stuff? No, it’s not an April Fool’s day joke, I only wish it were.

Please read this personal story from one woman who found, to her dismay, that the police are not going to do anything about her scary and unpleasant experience. Far from it.

From a woman whose daily dog walk in Surrey woods has been ruined…

Why do the police now think it’s OK for people to have sex in public?


Walking my dog in woodland a few weeks ago, I suddenly became aware of a man following me.  Not liking the look of him, I began to walk faster. From several paces behind me he called out: ‘Is this the place to get sex?’

I kept walking, uncomfortably aware that there was no one else around. ‘You’ve got nice legs,’ he called after me. I ignored him and walked faster. He walked faster, too. ‘Come on, love, give us a kiss.’ He sounded impatient. A brief glance behind me showed a man in his 40s, short and balding with a pot belly.

Melissa Kite with her dog Cydney at the woods

Melissa Kite with her dog Cydney at the woods

With the car park in sight, I started fumbling with my keys. He was still behind me, still asking if I would kiss him — and more. I clicked the wrong button as I tried to unlock the car door. ‘Oh come on, come on,’ I muttered desperately under my breath. Pressing the right button at last, I jumped in. As I drove off trembling, he was still there, shouting at me, his arms out to the side as if to say ‘What’s your problem?’ I kept driving until I reached home, unnerved and shaken.

What was most shocking to me was I had not ventured out after dark, or along a city centre back street after pub closing time. This happened in broad daylight in  picturesque Surrey woodland right next to the Royal Horticultural Society gardens at Wisley.

Indifferent Police

Later, when I called the police they were polite, but seemingly unperturbed. I explained, rather crossly, that this was not the first time this had happened. In fact, I come across men seeking partners for sex in these woods more and more often. It used to be a well-known spot among men cruising for gay sex, but increasingly the woods are also being used by straight men looking for encounters with women.

Surely, I asked the officer, the police should send a patrol just in case this particular man found another female  dog-walker to hassle — or worse? He replied that he would log my call and send an officer if they had one spare.

But as I put the phone down, I had little expectation of my complaint being investigated. This is because the leafy and peaceful area of Ockham and Wisley commons is now officially designated by the police as a ‘Public Sex Environment’, or PSE.

Married and Cheating

At night, the car park is filled with cars flashing their lights as dozens congregate, apparently unimpeded by police. Among the gay men who visit the woods during the day, many wear wedding rings. They sit in their cars, pretending they are reading a book, then follow another man into the woods. I once saw a man emerge with another man from behind a tree, then start walking back to the car park on his phone saying: ‘Yes darling, I’m on my way. Oh great, I love lamb chops.’

The police insist that PSE is simply a convenient shorthand and that it does not mean the activity is facilitated by the authorities. I disagree. They may not have intended it, but the term PSE has come to be seen by people who frequent such outdoor spaces as a badge of distinction.

PSE attracting clients

doggingI come across men seeking partners for sex in the woods more and more often, and they have now officially been designated by the police as a ‘Public Sex Environment’, or PSE.

In internet chatrooms, PSE is generally accepted, rightly or wrongly, to describe an area where open-air sex is lightly policed.

People now pull off the nearby A3 for sex in these woods, which sit in a glorious corner of Surrey between the attractive and well-heeled commuter districts of Esher and Guildford.

And they seem to have little fear of being caught because the police patrols are surprisingly infrequent.

To understand why this should be, you need to realise that there is nothing in the law that explicitly prohibits having sex outdoors, unless it can be proved that you are causing ‘alarm, harassment or distress’ to someone.

Perhaps we should not be surprised that in our increasingly inclusive, anything-goes society, there is very little censorship of open-air sex acts. The Sexual Offences Act 2003 outlaws flashing and sex in public toilets — but sex behind a tree is not illegal, per se.

What’s more, in 2008, an internal police report advised officers to avoid a ‘knee-jerk reaction’ to those found having sex in public spaces.

This politically correct attitude seems to have resulted in officers being reluctant to confront ‘doggers’ — the unpleasant term used to describe those who meet in public spaces and car parks to have, and watch others have, sex, because open-air sex has been deemed  simply another sexual preference. Perhaps the police fear that if these people are confronted they will go to the European Court of Human Rights to uphold their right to sexual fulfilment.

The Car Park at the woods in Surrey, a well known ‘dogging area’, ignored by police

There is certainly, according to those officers I have talked to, a concern that gay cruisers should not be confronted too robustly for fear the police will be deemed homophobic.

Indeed, when I called Surrey Police to ask them to explain their policy about sex in outdoor spaces, I was told that I would need to speak to their ‘diversity officer’ and also to LAGLO. ‘What is that?’ I asked. ‘It’s our Lesbian and Gay Liaison Officer,’ he said. In fact, the person who called me back with a response to my queries was a Press officer at Surrey Police headquarters, but his response will fill any right-minded person with utter despair.

‘Surrey Police works closely with local residents and users of the public sex environment (PSE) site at Wisley. Officers carry out regular patrols and if any criminal incidents arise then proportionate action will be taken. However, it is not against the law for people to be present at a PSE site with the purpose of meeting others to engage in conversation or activity that doesn’t contravene existing legislation.’

If you think this is straying into the absurd, it seems it is difficult to get anyone to take this subject seriously.

The UK TV Channel 4 showed a documentary called Dogging Tales, which looks at what it calls  ‘this peculiarly British pastime’. They make it sound like a game of cricket or a visit to a stately home. The film is shot in atmospheric soft-focus, but the men are manipulative, the women nervous and the overall impression is sad and sordid.

This is not a victimless pastime. Beauty spots are becoming no-go areas. At the stables where I keep my horses, there are mothers who will no longer let their daughters hack out into the countryside on their ponies because teenage girls have been flashed. Many people I know do not take their children for walks on the common for fear of what they may inadvertently stumble across.

I nearly stopped walking there myself after coming across three men engaged in a sex act I had never even heard of before I actually saw it. I felt troubled that my dog had witnessed it, never mind a child.

Disgusting Litter

Those who regularly walk in the woods also complain of the litter which accompanies such acts.  I’ve seen debris including condoms, pages of pornographic magazines, even underpants.

Stephen Bungay, who owns the Ockham Bites café on the Common, says that every morning before opening up he collects a bin-bag full of debris from outside his kiosk including sex toys and latex gloves.

‘I haven’t got a problem with what anyone does in their own home, but this is a lovely family place and I want families here,’ he says. ‘I have four children and if they saw  something like this it would scar them for life.’

The rangers from Surrey Wildlife pursue dog-walkers who fail to pick up dog-mess, but I have never seen them ask a cruiser to pick up their condoms.

Hazel Longworth, a Surrey resident, has been campaigning on the issue for years.

She says: ‘I’ve got a four-year-old grandson and I’m worried he will see people having sex, or pick up a used condom. It’s all very well saying people have the right to have sex in the woods, but what about our rights?’

If people are foregoing the pleasure of walking, horse-riding and going for picnics with their children in their local countryside then surely that does make them the victims of a crime. It should not fall to us to prove to the police that we were ‘alarmed, harassed or distressed’. If local forces patrolled known sites regularly, they would catch men and women indecently exposing themselves, and could impose on-the-spot fines. They are quick enough to fine any motorist caught parked on a double yellow line.

But it seems they just may not want to police this particular crime.

Two years ago, a Freedom of Information request to Surrey Police elicited an astonishing response. The request asked if the county force had given out food and drink at public sex sites as part of their strategy of policing these sites. The reply was ‘yes’, it had ‘provided teas and coffees to all members of society using the area for various reasons’.

The force were also asked how many public sex or cruising sites they were aware of in Surrey. The answer came back with estimates of 19 in Guildford, six in Waverley, nine in Woking, eight in both Elmbridge and Mole Valley — 50 in all.

Meanwhile, tonight’s Channel 4 documentary about ‘this intriguing and unusual’ pastime will doubtless appeal to viewers who pride themselves on being non-judgmental. In doing so, the film-maker no doubt wants to tackle the prejudices of people like me who want to enjoy the countryside without being hassled for sex. How very small-minded of me.

4 thoughts on “You’re Not Going To Believe This

  1. I walk my dog at Ockham Common each week and spoke to Surrey’s Wildlife Trust ranger about the state of PSE litter at the Common. She was very sympathetic but quite understandably, had limited budgets to do anything other than a Monday litter sweep and an annual contracted deep clean. In reality the folk who partake in these activities are hardly going to finish their business and then scramble around in the dark to collect tissues, condoms, gloves… The ranger also mentioned they had tried to lock the games at night but frequent vandalism and limited funds meant this was viable. Perhaps we should simply start taking photos of the car park and those who sit in their cars and create a “Ockham Fun Lovers” facebook page… I’m sure the wife cooking the lamb chops would be interested to know what her husband has been up to just before he walks in the door for supper.


  2. This is so scarey – I live in Guildford and often enjoy a walk in the coutryside around about. I’ve read about two of these sites in the local paper as many people have written in to complain, but nineteen!? Makes me feel quite concerned about where I go now.


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